The reverse golden rule

One of the uncomfortable lessons I’ve learned from years loitering in the world of personal development is that you’ve got to lean into the cringe. In other words, if some technique or piece of advice makes you squirm with embarrassment, and you’d never be seen dead reading a book on such a corny/emotional/”New Agey” topic… well, that’s probably a sign that you need it. It has touched something vulnerable in you, and the cringe reaction is your instinctive attempt at defence.

 
Let me clarify from the outset that this isn’t an argument for just gullibly accepting any old nonsense. (Scientology, for example, evokes in me a sort of pitying fascination, rather than making me cringe.) Additionally, I suspect the cringe reaction is especially prevalent in British people and in men – so I am owning the Venn diagram here, and maybe your experiences will differ. Still, I’ve found moving toward the cringe a remarkably useful strategy. Gratitude journals, talk therapy, dream analysis, morning pages: they’re all a bit cringe, and all tremendously useful. Over the years, though, the idea at which I’ve cringed the most is probably self-compassion – the notion that most of us could do with being quite a bit kinder to ourselves.

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Πηγή: ckarchive.com